How to Start a Successful Relationship With a New Girl
You have to toss out this idea of finding the “perfect” woman. She doesn’t exist and it’s all inside your head. There’s nothing wrong with having standards, but they need to be very realistic.
A lot of guys may even have NO standards and just take whatever woman life just gives you. This leaves you with the feeling of simply settling and never being satisfied when it comes to relationships.
The worst part of it is you take all that baggage with you from relationship to relationship, it becomes exhausting.
I’m going to share with you the ways of cutting down and handling that baggage.
Disclaimer: This is not a post about getting your ex back, but rather how to start and have a successful relationship with a new girl.
How to Start a Successful Relationship With a New Girl: Self-Examination
You need to find out where your relationship went wrong. Not just in your most recent relationship but ALL your relationships.
If girls are leaving you for your neediness, you need to fix that!
If you’ve been getting complaints of “You looked awesome in the beginning of our relationship but now you’re just fat!” Yes, women will sometimes say things out of spite during a break up but there’s some truth to those comments.
Rather than fearing the truth, you need to embrace it. Don’t run to the bottle, don’t mope around your friends, and don’t give up on life. We all have things we need to work on, I will be the first to admit that.
However don’t just talk about change, actually BE about change.
You also need time to heal, don’t just go from relationship to relationship. Don’t compete with your ex just cause she’s dating somebody doesn’t mean you have to. Date when you’re ready.
Relationships are all about consistency!
You can’t just “win” a girl over and then two months later decide you don’t want to put in any effort into the relationship by getting to know her still.
Women will complain that “You stop trying!” or “You use to do this!” a lot of guys want to point the finger and get into pointless fights and feed into drama. The problem is you’re the man and you have to lead.
Instead accept responsibility for your nonsense and own up to it. A lot of my ex’s were drama queens and I hated that, so I sought out a different type of girl.
Seek Out Change
I once dated the same type of girl over and over. Then one day I woke up and I decided that I wouldn’t date a girl that had these types of characteristics. I screened women hard before I got into a relationship again. I began saying, “I’m not dating anyone unless she’s an upgrade from my previous girlfriend.”
The point I’m making here is consider your relationships a stepping stone. You’re supposed to go forward not back or from left to right. I still slept with these types of women, but I avoided dating them at all costs.
The reason I didn’t begin dating them again was because they didn’t have what I wanted. They weren’t the adventurous types, they let their friends run their life, and they would complain. They would suck my time and energy from me and as a result they would hold me back in my life.
Sometimes they would be damsels in distress who would always need rescue. I am not a superhero, I’m a regular guy who gets tired and needs a break just like everyone else.
I didn’t want to date girls who would use me, abuse me, or treat me in a negative kind of way. I didn’t want to just be a nice guy provider.
When you start self improving and doing things for yourself, the people around you change. The girls who I once thought were amazing became so ordinary to me.
I began working out, going on trips, took new job opportunities, and met some really amazing people. I wanted to find a girl who could compliment me.
Know What You’re Looking For
This is by far the most important thing, you have to set the right standards.
I meet sexy women all the time, but unfortunately a lot of them would make lousy girlfriends. Because they lack the substance and skill set to make an awesome girlfriend for me.
If you’re the type of guy who always like going to point A to point B, you’re probably not going to be a good fit for the chill stay at home girl.
I do a lot of screens on women that thrive to tell me how adventurous she is. If a girl has some kind of drive, treats me with respect, and is independent that’s stellar. If a girl can barely hold a conversation with me, has zero ambition, and is a drag . . . I don’t care how great her pussy is I won’t date her!
A lot of guys will say “Eh, she’s just okay I’d never date her.”, then two weeks later they’re dating her. They say nothings changed about her, but the truth of the matter is they’ve settled for a girl they didn’t really want.
I don’t care how lonely you get or what holiday it is, never settle for a girl you’re not truly interested in.
Because in truth you should never hurt a girl and lead her on, girls will completely understand if you say, “Hey, you’re just not right for me.” They’ll be sad, but they’ll respect you and move on to some other guy.
Make a realistic list of qualities you want a girl to have, and then if you have a FWB or lover who wants to be your girlfriend think logically about if she fits those qualities.
In conclusion, don’t worry about her ever being able to find a guy, believe me even unattractive girls have options.
Women have a biological clock and they can’t afford to mope around about some guy. This is why you’ll run into women who have some really heavy baggage. The thing you want to do as a guy to lessen your baggage is give yourself time to heal, examine your mistakes, find someone new, and qualify her.
Regardless of your situation you need to be sleeping with many different women so you can stay free from your ex.
Remember relationships always look better than what they were when you look back on them. To be a successful seducer you must always be looking forward while learning from previous mistakes.
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